“Smart” Dinner Party Planning

Everyone loves the idea of a charming and elegant dinner party.  We love to look at photographs of tables set in anticipation of beautifully dressed guests and imagine all the witty conversation that might take place and dream about the delicious food to be served.  The desire to host, or be a part of, one of these parties is strong for most of us…the problem comes, not in the dreaming about such an event, but in the execution of this kind of a party.
If you plan ahead and break it down, it is certainly doable for just about anyone.  The key is in the planning.  So let’s go through some key elements to having a successful dinner party.

The most important ingredient in a successful party is a hostess who is having fun and, if you are worn out from not sleeping, feeling guilty for hollering at your husband or children just before your guests arrive, or stressed about how everything is coming together, rest assured your guests will feel it, no matter how good a “face” you try to put on it.  I can attest to this because I have been the stressed out hostess and had to learn the hard way that it isn’t “smart” at all to host people under such conditions.

When you get the urge to have a more sophisticated dinner party there are certain things you must consider as you begin the planning.  First is your guest list.  Only invite people with whom you truly will enjoy spending an evening.  If you are having a sit down affair the number of guests will obviously be determined by two things….the size of your table and the number of place settings of dishes and flatware and glasses you have.  The size of your table is not negotiable unless, of course, you are prepared to buy a temporary “top” to sit on your table that is a bit larger than what your table is, so as to give you more seating.  I have done this in my own dining room as my table seats 8 very comfortably, though I can seat 10 if necessary.   However, when I want to seat 10 really comfortably or even 12, I add a 72″ round plywood top to my otherwise 60″ table and voila!…I can seat up to  12 people.

The other thing to consider is a tablecloth if you are adding a top to enlarge your table.  Your actual dining table may be pretty enough to put the plates, napkins, glasses and flatware on without table linens.  But if you don’t have a pretty table, or if you are using a faux top to be able to seat more people, you will need a tablecloth, and preferably one that is full length, that comes to the floor.  The Two Chums tend to always use floor length table cloths as we like the drama it affords for little money and effort.  You can make one if you sew or buy one if you prefer.  A possible option for ordering on line  is eFavorMart.com  A tablecloth is a good investment that you will use again and again.

The next things to be considered are your dishes, flatware and glasses.  Most people these days don’t have 12 or even 8 place settings of fine china.  Many are lucky if they have 4 full place settings.  Let me stop and clarify here.  By full place setting I am referring to a dinner plate, salad plate, bread and butter plate, cup and saucer and dessert plate, and possibly a soup bowl.  Sometimes the salad and dessert plates are the same and you may have only one that you use for both salad and dessert, that is perfectly fine, it just means that if you are serving a salad at your party, you will have to wash the plates after dinner and before the dessert is served.

You could however, choose to use a completely different set or pattern of dishes for dessert.  That is perfectly acceptable, and in fact you may choose to use different patterns for each course of the meal or different place settings for each person.  This works well if you need to borrow dishes from friends or your sister or mother for example and you don’t all have the same pattern of china.  You can happily mix and match dishes.  The only thing to watch out for in doing this is that you don’t mix fine china with pottery dishes or “everyday” dishes.  Pottery, or earthenware as it is commonly referred to, is made from a different kind of clay than porcelain is, and looks and feels heavier, so I wouldn’t mix these two kinds of dishes.

The same rules apply to flatware and glasses that we spoke of with regard to dishes, mixing and matching is fine.  Again though, with flatware, don’t mix silver (whether it is sterling or silverplate) with stainless steel.  Use one or the other as they each have a very different look and feel to them.

Now, on to the menu.  The most important rule here is to keep it SIMPLE!!!  Don’t try to be Wolfgang Puck or Julia Childs at your dinner party.  Remember the most important element to a successful party is a hostess who is enjoying herself, and that won’t be the case if you are trying too hard.  You aren’t inviting people to put on a show and impress them, you just want them to know they are worth your time and effort, and you want them to feel special.  You can achieve that very well by setting a beautiful table, and serving them a well thought out menu of tasty food.

From time to time we will give you menu and theme suggestions for dinner parties.  For the purposes to getting started here we are going to start with a classic menu.  Today we will start with hors d’oeuvres.  You may have wondered as I did, what, if any, difference there is between an hors d’oeuvre and an appetizer.  The short answer is this:  hors d’oeuvres are usually one bite items offered to your guests before they are seated at the table and are served stationary on a tray atop a table or are passed on a tray.  Appetizers are served after your guests are seated and are actually a first course of the meal.

As you are planning your menu for the evening, decide whether you want to put your time and effort into the hors d’oeuvres or the main course.  Don’t be too ambitious and try to do both things in elaborate ways.  If you have a list of fun ideas for hors d’oeuvres that you have been wanting to try out, and that will take a bit of prep, choose an entrée that is delicious but no fuss.  OR, conversely, if there is a main course you want to make that is on the more labor intensive side, then make sure your hors d’oeuvres and dessert are simple and easy to prepare.  Just don‘t put yourself in the place of having a lot of last minute preparations that will take you away from your guests and keep you tied up in the kitchen.  At a large party this may work as there are so many people, one less person isn’t a big problem.  But at a small dinner party your absence will be very obvious and make your guests uncomfortable.  If you realize, on the night of the party, that you do have more to do than you thought you would, let a guest who offers to help you, do just that.  Chances are they will enjoy helping or they wouldn’t have offered and you both will be able to rejoin the party faster that way.

As you are planning out your menu for the evening think of choosing the food the way you would choose an outfit.  People commonly make the mistake of thinking they have to make each part of the meal completely different and unique from every other part.  This is not true.  You wouldn’t wear, for example, a yellow striped dress with turquoise shoes and a silver handbag, while sporting a fucshia paisley wrap.   While each individual piece of clothing might be really lovely, all put together it is too much and wouldn’t be particularly pleasing to see.  The same idea is true of food.  While individual elements might be very tasty, the combination can sometimes be overwhelming to your taste buds and what seemed like a fun variety of foods can turn out to seem more like a hodge podge of flavors.

There is really nothing wrong with using a food element in more than one part of the meal.  For instance you may have stuffed mushrooms in your hors d’oeuvres and a mushroom sauce on your meat. Or you may have strawberries in your salad and in your dessert.  There is no problem with doing that, any more than there is a problem with wearing red shoes and red lipstick at the same time.   In fact it is a good idea as one compliments the other.  So keep this in mind as you are deciding what your menu will be.

Having said that, you may have a signature dish that you love to make and that everyone asks for, when you are cooking.  If so, incorporate that into your menu and adjust the other things you serve around it.

For the dinner party menu we are going to give you this week, our hors d’oeuvres  are simple, do-ahead-of-time,  items.  We will start with the recipes for those “starters” today and give you the recipes and ideas for the rest of the meal later this week.   But remember, from the dreaming, to the inviting, to the table set up, to the meal planning, to the actual cooking and serving…have fun:)  And always incorporate for your guests and for yourself, large doses of love, joy and abundant living!

Here are three wonderful hors d’oeuvres that are always a hit and are easy to make ahead.  They are Hot Artichoke Dip, Bacon Wrapped Dates, and Cocktail Shrimp with a Spicy Louie Sauce.

Hot Artichoke Dip 
You can find the recipe for this delicious and simple dip by clicking on the link above.  It is by far our favorite hors d’oeuvres and the one dish everyone always loves and asks us to make.  It seems no one ever tires of this classic.

Bacon Wrapped Dates
These tasty little morsels work because they are sweet and salty, creamy and crunchy, hot and just plain scrumptious!

Pitted Dates
Cream cheese
Thinly sliced bacon

Cut the pitted date open lengthwise. Stuff with a piece cream cheese that is about the size of a marble.

Cut bacon strips in half and fry in a skillet for about 30 -60 seconds.  This will render out some of the fat from the bacon.  Do not allow it to begin to brown.  While it is still soft remove it from the pan and allow it to drain.  Wrap bacon around the cream cheese stuffed date and secure with a tooth pick.  Bake on a baking sheet in a 400 degree oven for about 10 minutes or just until bacon is crisp.

You can make these, up to the point of baking them, the day before and then just pop them in a preheated oven 10 minutes before your guests should be arriving.  Remove  from oven and serve them immediately.  They are best hot, but can be served at room temperature if you prefer to bake them ahead of time.

 Cocktail Shrimp with Spicy Louie Sauce 

1 lb. peeled and deveined shrimp (wild caught are best)
1/2 cup vinegar
1/2 cup water
1 Tablespoon Old Bay Seasoning
1 teaspoon salt
Fresh lemon juice

Bring vinegar, water, salt, and Old Bay Seasoning to a boil in a pan.  Add shrimp and cook for 5 minutes.  Drain shrimp in a colander or strainer and immediately top with crushed ice and juice from a lemon.  When shrimp is cooled completely, serve with Louie Sauce.

Spicy Louie Sauce
1 cup Best Foods mayonnaise
1/4 cup Heinz ketchup
2 Tablespoons of fresh horseradish, grated or finely chopped in blender
1 bunch green onions, only the white and lightest green parts, chopped finely
1/4 cup finely chopped celery

Mix all ingredients and serve chilled with shrimp.